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Marry Girlfriend Who Drinks Too Much?

Joan Jerkovich - January 14, 2015 8:47 pm

I’ve been dating a girl for 2 years and really think she could be the one except for one thing. When we go out she always drinks too much to where I end up taking care of her the rest of the night. When I try to talk to her about her drinking she passes it off like she’s just a party girl having fun. Even her friends don’t get as drunk as she does when we’re out together. Should I be concerned?

Yes. Repeated instances of drinking to the point of drunkenness or passing out are not social drinking. It is a sure sign of someone who has a problem with alcohol…but you already know this, which is why you are asking this question.

You have a difficult decision to make, because if you choose to make her your wife, her drinking will impact all aspects of your life. Assuming she is a problem drinker, odds are that this problem will only get worse over time.

What can you expect in a marriage to an alcoholic or binge drinker? Lies, lies and more lies about the drinking; living in fear that they will get hurt or hurt someone else by drunk driving; a roller coaster of emotions where they can be angry drunk or angry hung-over leading to a higher incidence of abusive behavior; irresponsible behavior with work, finances and children and often an escalation to other drugs.

An addicts desire and need for their drug of choice will be all consuming. Yes, there is the hope of recovery, but be prepared for multiple episodes of relapse.

Sorry, I know this sounds bleak, but that said, I know some really good people who suffer with addictions. This illness is one of humanities great tragedies.

Embrace your Personal Power with Life Coaching~

  • How committed are you to be with a partner who suffers with an addiction?
  • What strengths could you bring to this type of relationship?
  • What are your weaknesses and vulnerabilities?
  • Is this the type of marriage you envision for yourself and your future family?
  • How willing are you to place your heart on the line as you ride this roller coaster?
Joan Jerkovich, BCC Board Certified Life Coach

Joan Jerkovich, BCC
Board Certified Life Coach

 
The Joan Jerkovich Show
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Keith Davis

January 16, 2015 at 3:30 am

“Yes, there is the hope of recovery, but be prepared for multiple episodes of relapse”.

Me being a dual addition addict/alcoholic I am wondering if maybe you should have said, “Yes, there is the hope of recovery, but be prepared for the possibility of relapse”.

Not all recovering addicts relapse.

You know this as well ad I do. I got clean and sober March 7, 1977 with the help of the Norton Valley Hope people. I have not relapsed one time though I must say that the possibility is present. But, with faith, honesty, communication, God and AA/NA, prayer and even taken time one day or even one moment at a time continuous recovery is very possible and does happen.

Thank you.

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