My fiancé and I have a long distance relationship. When I was last in town, he invited his friend, who’s a girl, over to watch sports. He sat on the couch next to her until he noticed the look I gave him. He then moved to the other couch.
Then, when we were eating dinner and ran out of plates, he ate out of his girl friend’s plate without washing it. Is this normal?
This does sound suspicious. This friendship may be more “intimate” than is appropriate for “just friends”, or it may be completely innocent. Just for the sake that you took the time to send me this question, leads me to believe that you too are suspicious of their relationship.
What you need to do right now is keep your eyes and ears wide open. Look for the truth of their relationship in what you hear and see going on. In addition, you need to communicate with your fiancé.
Have you discussed your concerns with your fiancé? What does he tell you about their friendship? Are you always invited to be with them when they spend time together? What are the rules of your long distance relationship with regard to spending time with opposite sex friends?
Another question to ask yourself is this: Has your fiancé ever cheated on you, or any other girlfriend? If he has, you have even more cause for concern, as most people repeat their past behavior.
While you don’t want to fall into the trap of being overly suspicious, you also do not want to sit in denial. So look, listen, and communicate. In time you will uncover the truth about your fiancé and his female friend.
Friendships Need Healthy Boundaries. Student Career Choices. Student Sets Boundaries With Friends. Set Boundaries For Self Protection. LISTEN to these topics on “The Joan Jerkovich Show,” this Saturday from 6-7am; or Sunday from 9-10pm. Listen to 1150 KSAL as “Your Life Coach” brings you “Empowering Talk Radio!”
Joan Jerkovich, BCC
Board Certified Life Coach
