Attend Which Wedding? (Joan vs. Dr. Laura)

Just for fun, I’m going to pose a question I heard Dr. Laura Schlessinger answer on her radio talk show…

The female caller told Dr. Laura that her question related to her two good girl friends. The two friends were not friends with each other, just the caller. The question posed to Dr. Laura was that each of the friends had daughters who were getting married, and the save-the-dates came out with the same wedding day. The caller wanted to know which wedding she should attend.

Dr. Laura, in her usual brusque style, didn’t ask for more information, but quickly advised the caller to attend the wedding she first got invited to, and send a card and gift to the second. Dr. Laura treated this call, and caller, like this question was a “no-brainer”, “why even ask”, as the answer was so obvious.

In the course of the conversation, the caller tried to mention how she might attend the church ceremony of the first and…(here’s where she got rudely interrupted, as is customary with Dr. Laura’s style)…and…it seemed she was about to say she could attend the reception of the second invite?

But no! Dr. Laura’s advice was definitive. The caller should only attend the wedding of the first person she got the save-the-date from. End of story, hang up, on to the next caller.

Which wedding should she attend?

Joan’s advice…

First, it would be good to have more information. At the very least, it would help to have heard the rest of the sentence (that Dr. Laura so rudely interrupted) where the caller seemed to be open to attending the church ceremony of the first and the reception of the second.

In true Life Coaching form, the caller does know how she would like to handle these conflicting invitations. She just needed more time, and questions, and some active listening from the radio talk show host, to process the answer that makes the most sense for her.

It would be reasonable, if the weddings were being held close to each other, for the caller to split her time between both events. After all, she seemed to express an equal regard for the two friends and was struggling over the dilemma of which wedding to attend.

If the weddings are too far apart to split the time with, I would advise the caller to decide which friend she feels closest to and attend that wedding. Even if she feels similarly close to both friends, with further thought, one will surely surface as the top choice.

It seems silly, as Dr. Laura advised, to base this decision solely on which invitation came first in the mail versus how close you are as friends. But, then again, who am I to argue with Dr. Laura? Maybe Dr. Laura could use some Life Coaching? Or at the very least some lessons in listening? Call me Dr. Laura! I’ll book you in as a caller to “The Joan Jerkovich Show”!